Thursday's and Incubus

What would happen
if I told you to drive?
Which way would your thoughts run me?
Straight off the cliff
throw off me the mountain.
Free fall
all ready fallen.
Free fallen but I've already fallen.

I dunno, maybe I try to hard

Everyone Hates Chad Kroeger

First of all, I love stumble upon. And when it brings theme's, it becomes very obvious. One hiliarious, but bordering on annoying, is the hatred of Nickelback. We've all heard the comparison of How You Remind Me in one speaker and Someday in the other and hearing the exact same song.

But did you know that Chad Kroeger can do an amazing act. Ah, If only the internet had the magical powers those who send chain emails wish it did.

For a real world example of how much Nickelback actually suck, check this video, hilarious to say the least.

But did you know that Nickelback causes global warming? Join in my blockade and save our world and our ears!

Rosie the Riveter sketch

I'm not sure if this is funny or not, but it sure amused me. I hope the concepts are clear enough, nothing too complicated here

A house with 4 long corridors connecting to 4 almost turret like buildings.
Zoom into one of the turrets, it ‘s a fancy dining room table with a table set for 3. Only the mother and the son are present and they are both fuming at the empty place at the table.
Cut to the boy sitting on his bed swinging his legs. He looks at the phone in his hand, picks it up and dials. Cut to a bubble of his father and him talking to each other connected by a telephone cord.
“We missed you at dinner”
“I was busy”
“We both know where you were”
“Look, now isn’t the best time.”
“I’m coming over”
“Now is not a good time jimmy!”
“I don’t care, I ‘ll see you soon!”

The boys circle vanishes and the man’s expands to reveal the entire room. He is lying next to his wife in bed. They are both sweaty and naked. He looks at her “That was Jimmy, he’ll be here in a minute.”
Jimmy kicks down the door and is immediately embarrassed. He straightens himself and accuses his dad “So where were you for dinner?” His wife takes up the tone and starts asking the same thing.
slides out from under the bed and winks. Cut to next scene

Danny

For lack of a better title at the moment, this story is called Danny. It's less than 800 words so it should go really quickly if you only got a minute.

The sun was setting and Danny was stoned, he had been smoking in the sun since noon so by now he was as mellow as mellow can get. He didn’t notice when Gloria sat down next to him. After a minute he looked over and saw her “Oh, hey sis, when did you get here?” She smiled softly, “Just a minute ago Danny, don’t worry.” She lit up her smoke. “So you missed it then.” Danny’s face turned an even whiter shade of pale as Gloria passed her smoke to him. “Missed what?” Danny laughed a little “Me telling him that I’ve lost that three quarters of a million he gave me for the start up.” Gloria grabbed her smoke back “Are you trying to kill the old man?” Danny smirked “He certainly tried to kill me.” Gloria blinked. Danny cleared his throat and spat into the sand.

“I’m not worried though, I’ve been in tighter spots before.” Gloria shook her head, the smoke settling around them in the lack of a breeze. “Not with dad’s money you haven’t.” “So why are you here Gloria?” Danny tries to stand up, his legs swaying the whole way. He holds his hand out to Gloria expecting support but she pulls him down face first into the sand. Gloria starts laughing but it quickly turns into a deep hacking cough. Danny flips onto his back and stares at the stars.

“Hey Gloria?”
“Yeah Danny?”
“What am I going to do?”
“The same thing you always do Daniel Jacob March. You’ll mope for a while, find a girl who finds your stoned melancholy sexy, dump her and go on with your life.”
Danny got up. “Is that what you think of me?”
“Gloria giggles a little. “Pardon?”
“So I’m just some lazy stoner pervert then”
“You left out charming” Gloria said with a grin
“Well you know what Gloria?” Danny got back on his feet, solid as a rock.
Gloria looked at him mildly “What Danny”

“You’re wrong. I’m not just some stoned bachelor, you’ll see.” He pulled out his cell to call a cab, because they had reposed his Mazda. Danny walked off to the road, leaving his sister amazed and his shoes buried in the sand. His sister caught up with him and tried to hand his shoes back, but without even looking down Danny just dropped them and walked over the shoes and kept walking. Gloria knelt down to pick them up and said “What am I supposed to tell dad?” Danny turns back but doesn’t stop walking. He raises his arms in frustration and says “tell him…tell him I’m going to find God!” Gloria laughs awkwardly and turns back to the house.

Danny sits at the picnic table and lights his 2nd last smoke as he waits for the cab. Great, now what have I gotten myself into, he thinks. Maybe Twiggy knows someone who can help me. The cab ride was short because the bad part of town that Danny could now afford to stay in was close to the beach. Up until last week he had been living in a penthouse, on top of the world. Now he had enough money for 3 weeks at the White House, no bath.

Danny paid the cabby what little money had left and went inside the White House. It was country & western night. Every night could be C & W night at the White House, but on Thursdays they cover the floor in sawdust and hide the spittoons. Danny trudged over to the front desk and said hello to Twiggy. Twiggy was in hell. He was the tallest, skinniest, most punk rock white kid Danny had ever seen and was in the running for most facial piercing’s. He had only taken the job because it came with a free room.

“Yeah Danny, one from a Mr. March.” Twiggy passed the message to Danny who crumpled it up and threw it in the trash without reading.
“Where am I Twiggy?”
“I don’t know man, you just stepped out.”
“You’re a real friend Twiggy, have fun tonight”
Twiggy rolls his eyes “You go to hell man”
Danny just laughs “Hey man, you know where I can find God?”
Twiggy thinks for a minute. “Isn’t He that dude that hangs out back of the KFC?”
It was Danny’s turn to think. “Could be man, you never know. Thanks.”
As Danny was pushing the door open to leave he heard Twiggy yell “Hold on a minute man!” Danny turned just in time to catch Twiggy’s doc marten boots. “I can’t ta-” “Shut the hell up and get outta here man.” The door swung shut.

The End Of A Forgotten Love Song

Headphones on.
Eyes stuck in my book,
waiting for the world
to pass me by.
Hoping I don't get damned
for not wanting to try.

A Different View

I went for a walk
just the other day.
Pulled my head out of my ass
and this is what I had to say.
You gotta listen to me brothers
you gotta listen to the beat
you gotta listen to the melody
I can hear it through my feet

Strolling through the midnight palms
I thought I heard a question mark
He asked me if it would be okay
if he could borrow some time.

Come on out and stretch your legs
a different view is all you need
We are all so mighty out here
we might as well die young
we might as well die young

underneath the crescent moon
we search the for the hidden frog
on fool it`s just the ice
the other wants his time back
the other wants his time back

You gotta listen to me brothers
you gotta listen to the beat
you gotta listen to the melody
I can hear it through my feet

blindsided by the embers
i can still the moon falling
their ears are too clogged with prophets
they`ll never know.

You`ve locked your shadow on the wall
if you wanna erase it you`ll have to crawl
no not for me, I wouldn`t let that be
I know you want to be free

16 Stones

There are 2 ways to read these, the first is each 4 lines is it own separate mini poem or you can read it as one giant poem that means....something or other.


The inukshuk stands between us
16 stones and an ancient legend
supposed to tell me where to go
but all it wants to do
is keep me away.

I was led to the alter
for the worship of water
Rushing around over the rocks
twisting my head and losing the plots

Urban sprawl
a dead motif
too many crows for a murder
might as well be 10 000 feet deep.

I was lead to the water
but was not forced to drink
the priests gulp it down
and piss out forgiveness

Steel Stetson

Though his beard hangs long with frost
his memory has remained true.
He may remember what is lost
but he won't tell you 'till it's due.
"Good luck with that"
the man with the steel stetson hacked.
His cold blue eyes
belong to his huskies
but his anger
belongs to me.

A Series of Small Roadtrip Poems

Father you made me leave
mother you made me follow.
As a generation we are one
to your basements we do flock.



Farmers burn the land
as we burn dinosaurs.
Rolling along the network of scars
that cover our promises.



A quaint little farmhouse
in the middle of nowhere.
Strings hold our minds together
occam's razor has to fall.


Would you be able to
fit your whole life and
all the things you bought into a metal box
being towed by another metal box?

Social Circles

Two social circles
meeting in a jumble
of egos, identities and gender.
Never knowing
who's touched nerve
or who thinks they're batman
or even bathroom man.

The Bloodkin

Shed the bloodkin
as quickly as they came.
For though you shall both burn bright
one shall feed off the other's light
and the other shall only last halfway
through this long hot summers night.

Tie the bloodknots off.
Stop the circulation.
Reach in your viens and find your strength
Rip it out so you can feed.
There is no truth you can bleed.